Catching Up With John Mark Karr


We caught up with famed prankster and avid child lover John Mark Karr lurking behind some bushes by a playground in Westwood, CA yesterday, and he was kind enough to answer a few questions.

John, as you know was the first to break the story about your upcoming game show on Fox, “Are You HOTTER Than A 5th Grader.” However, recent reports coming from Fox state that they have halted production. What gives?

celeb-jihad“Sadly, those reports are true. Fox ran an episode for a test audience and it received more ratings of “creepy and disturbing” than the Fox execs were comfortable with. But after a few hours brainstorming we reworked the show into a form I believe mainstream America will find acceptable. The new show is titled “Are You More TICKLISH Than A 5th Grader.”

I will have an assistant that tickles the contestant while I tickle various 5th graders. We recently purchased a tickle-o-meter from some pedos at NASA to track the results. This will be one of the most challenging shows on TV because, in my experience, 5th graders are extremely ticklish. Now, if you’ll excuse me, school is back in session, so this is a very busy time of year for me.”

Just one more question if I may. Who are you supporting in the upcoming election, John McCain or Barak Obama?

“I like that Palin girl.”

Gov. Sarah Palin from Alaska? Aren’t you afraid that she may be too inexperienced for the job?

celeb-jihad“Who? No, not the mom; Piper Palin. I must have watched the video of her licking her hand 50 times on You Tube. That moment really, ahem… moved me. Also, as you can imagine, I prefer the type of inexperience Piper is going to bring, not like that whore sister of hers. Piper is a true outsider and adorable to boot. She’s got my full support.”

Thanks for your time, John Mark Karr, and happy hunting!